Saying Goodbye Part 2...

Today has been a rough day...Hell, this weekend has been pretty rough. LOTS. OF. PACKING. Unfortunately, I had to pack not only for this semester, but for next semester as well. I had to separate a lot of clothes into the "Good Will" pile, the "Muhlenberg" pile, the "Staying in Michigan" pile, and finally, the "Ghana" pile. Not to mention the trash pile. Ugh. Right after I get back from Ghana I am going straight to Florida, not Michigan, and so I need Wesley to transfer all my stuff over to the storage space before school starts. Otherwise, I would have hardly no winter clothing slash any clothing for next semester...So, between my mother trying to motivate me to pack, myself having mini freak-outs and realizations, all the while trying to avoid the massive black hole that had become my room, I had my hands full.

Two suitcases and one backpack later, I am finally packed and ready to go. I already know I overpacked clothing-wise, but what put me over the edge was some personal touches and items that I included not for necessity per say, but for my sanity. I included two of my dad's t-shirts, a shirt and zip-up of Ethan's, a sweatshirt of Wesley's, a set of pictures to put on my walls, and even two Muhlenberg posters (Judas and Music Man). Not to mention a season or two of Gilmore Girls...haha. But honestly, knowing that I have these things makes me feel more safe. They have elements of home within them- and by having them abroad with me, I feel closer to those I love (silly and pathetic, but true).

All day I tried to put-off the fact that I had to say goodbye to my parents and my brother. Whenever I had the thought, I would immediately shove it back where it came from. I knew it was coming eventually though, regardless of how much I wanted to put it off. Time never stops ticking away. The car ride to the airport consisted of me laying on Wesley's lap and trying not to notice my mother's consistent tears. I know she tried to conceal them with her sunglasses, but I'm a smart girl ;). When we got to the airport I hugged my dad first, trying to remember his smell and the stubble of his cheeks against mine. The feeling that nothing will ever harm me in his grasp...just the simple notion of safety he exhibits by his presence is astounding. My suitcases were safely outside of the car and my dad gathered all of us together in an embrace as we prayed over my trip. I remember wondering what we must have looked like to the casual passerby- a family huddled together with their eyes closed- a father spreading his arms over us like a shield...I felt very loved and honored to be part of such a supportive, wonderful family. And even though I am currently questioning my faith extremely, I was relieved by the prayer for safe travels and wisdom. For while I am questioning Christianity and segments of God, I have never doubted his presence.

My dad drove off to the cell phone lot and my mom and brother followed me in to get checked in. Right before security the tears began to flow. My mother, already in tears, hugged me for a long time and once again, all I could think about was trying to imprint her touch, her scent, her unconditional love for me in my memory to access later when times get hard. It wasn't long before I had to turn to Wesley, my best friend, future best man, most incredible guy and brother I know, and say goodbye. This was harder than I let show. He has been my constant companion. My partner in crime. My accompanist, my shoulder to cry on, the one I turn to for all problems. I will miss him more than words can say. Love you, bro.

 I could barely squeeze out the words, "I love you" before I quickly turned away and walked towards security. Once I established a sizable barrier between us, I turned back and smiled to show them I could handle the emotions (when I secretly could not, but whatever). Once through security, I grabbed the largest iced caramel macchiato available to ease the pounding headache that had formed and headed to my gate. I could finally sit down and relax. The hardest part was over. I cannot even begin to tell you how hard it was. But what a relief! Now it's time to sit back, and enjoy the ride, right? Such an adventure is up ahead...and I feel so incredibly lucky that I have been privileged to be a part of it.

Saying goodbye to my family made me realize how lucky I am to have such a close bond to my family. I have people to miss, people I will think about constantly and long to get home to. However, they aren't going anywhere. There is a comfort within this concept that while I have such an incredible family, and I know I will miss them terribly, I feel blessed to know I have someone that loves me. I felt very loved today. What a privilege. That is something that one does not experience in everyday life.

However, now I am in Baltimore and at the lovely Miss Kimberly's house, and cannot believe what is about to unfold. I am ready to begin. Tomorrow we will take care of a last few items packing wise, and then hopefully get some time in with Adrian before we leave. But then we fly out at 10:44 pm at Dulles, and arrive in Accra at 1:30 pm the next day. Roughly an eleven hour flight. Wow. It's finally here :) Maggie will be meeting us there, and finally us three will be on the plane that will bring us to a place that will quite surely change us forever. I am thrilled while still hosting quite a healthy dose of nerves.

Prayers are appreciated! We will need them. Wish me luck! I love you all.